Bed Bed Bed! Hurrah Hurrah Hurrah!

So, it’s just past 10am and I have been waiting to the point of Violet Beauregarde-bursting for the delivery men to come with our bed. I have already mentioned how just buying a bed here has been a MAJOR financial investment, and I don’t mean like when I was broke in NYC and had to buy my bed there one piece at a time every paycheck (after spending over two months slumbering on my sleeping bag on the wooden floor). But after traveling to the “big” town, which is beyond the first “somewhat big” town, we finally found a compromise of sorts. It’s one of those wooden plank frames/headboards + mattress. No box spring, but I couldn’t give a shit at this point. Since I arrived, Beau and I have been sleeping on what amounts to a pull-out bed, but that’s being rather generous. Not that pull-out beds in America are known for their luxurious comfort, but the bed we’ve been sleeping on here has a mattress about the width of a Triscuit and just about as comfortable. After a couple days, we started noticing not only did we have some pretty nasty back pain and poor nights of sleep, but we were literally developing bruises on our shoulders and hips. This kind of made the need to buck up and get a bed a priority. We found one in Whakatane (which is pronounced, I kid-you-not, “FUCK-a-tah-nee,” emphasis on ‘fuck’), for a steal of a price -- $799 NZD. *gulp* We figured if one day we ever get a guest room or bang out a child, we’ll buy a new bed – one of those $1500 ones that look so soft and comfy that you can’t imagine emerging from the again.

Anyway, being out in the sticks as we are, we had to wait several days until the one day a week they grudgingly come out our way. That’d be today. I had all the curtains dramatically flung open and have been running around doing quick chores while always having one eye fixed on the road. When I looked out the window and saw the Meikles truck parked in front of my house, I flew to the door and flung it open so fast, that the guy standing their, hand in mid-knock, jumped back and exclaimed, “Shit!” I was pretty happy to see them.

For 20 minutes I tried in vain to keep calm and patient, playing Civ IV on the computer and trying not to look at them or bother them in any way possible. When they were first bringing it in, I was kinda leading them to the bedroom, really just in the fucking way, and because of the strange way they had to maneuver the bed into the bedroom, found myself backed up into the toilet room (toilets get their very own tiny room here apart from the sink and bathroom – something I really like a lot), and was kind of pushed back up against the toilet as the guy was inches in front of me trying to get the frame into the bedroom. Feeling like the idiot I was, I waited ‘til the way was clear and then slunk back to the couch in the living room and demurely played my computer from then on.

After they were done and leaving (barely a word spoken by them at all), I was lighting sparklers and waving them off with a white handkerchief. Okay, I didn’t really do that, but I did in my mind. After closing and locking the front door (I’m still paranoid as a woman home alone), I ran into the bedroom and did a running leap, landing spread-eagled onto the bed in pure joy. Laying there and giggling, I suddenly realized that the men in their large loading truck, still parked just outside the bedroom window in front, may have just witnessed my act of glee. I kind of laid still for a minute, feeling stupid, again. Then I slowly turned my head over and raised it. Phew, couldn’t see them. Some dignity remained.

Then I bopped up and went to get the mattress pad still secure in its packaging. We had forgone the “required” soft woolen underlay, so the mattress pad alone would have to do. Mattress pads suck. They always look so lush and impressive in their package, and then you pull them out and they’re like a maxi pad with elastic ends. The one I pulled out of its plastic carrying case could have easily set the record for out-of-the-package disappointment. Nevertheless, the bed is new, yahoooo, so, so what. I’ve got the bed, I’ve got the really nice, comfortable down comforter *cough* duvet, I’ve even got a pretty good set of white sheets we brought with us from the U.S. Someday we’ll get that gotta-have underlay, but for now, I’m laying in paradise.