The Creepy Bread Fairy

These kinds of things used to happen to me almost on a daily basis. Creepy for real life, great for blogging. Alas, they're much more infrequent now, but still just as fun....

It all started when I was sitting outside on my break from my new temp job here in Columbia, MO. The job itself is fine -- somewhat tedious, but since it's just a way to make money for the next month or so, I'm happy with it. I was reading The Pale Horseman by Bernard Cornwell, a book I was totally into, when an old man pulled up in a rush and swooshed into the no parking space in front of me.

As he got out and started jogging to the door of the building, he looked at me and said, "Will you watch my truck for me, darling?"

I blinked in confusion. Thinking he was joking, or crazy, I shouted out, "Sure, no problem" and went back to my book.

About 5 minutes later he emerged from the building, and passing me again, called out, "Thanks, sweetheart!" "No problem," I replied and just as I was about to read again, he motioned me to come over to his truck.

Uh oh. Creepy Man Alert.

Oh, what the hell. I got up and walked about halfway to his truck, staring at him. At first, I thought he was reaching for his wallet. WTF? Is he going to try to PAY me for this? Instead, to my astonishment, he pulled out a large loaf of bread and held it out to me.

"Uhhh, yeah. I don't really think I should be taking your bread."

"No, really, I've got TONS of these. Take it!"

Peering at the bread, I saw that it was the exact kind Beau and I buy for our FREQUENT turkey or peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (the "Save Money for New Zealand Diet"). It was really good bread! Though I don't mind subsisting off of PB&J that much, I do insist that the bread is decent.

I still hesistated. Isn't this the part in the scary movies where the audience is shouting at the screen, "Don't do it! Run away!"??

*shrug*

I grabbed the bread, thanked him, and he drove off. Thus, with my 10-minute break over, I turned around and awkwardly walked back into the office building, my purse in one hand, the loaf of bread dangling from another.

Back in my boss' office, she stared at me for a moment and then said, "You went and bought bread on your 10 minute break?"

"Erm, not exactly."