Whaddya Say?

I've mentioned before how I love to poke fun at Beau for his very "rural" idiomatic expressions. And as someone who actually taught "American Idioms" to a classroom of foreign students, I'm fascinated with idioms -- their origin both location-wise and meaning-wise. And I just also find them really fun, though not all that easy to teach. The first one I ever taught my Thai students was "raining cats and dogs" and even though they picked the true meaning up quickly, they still loved to repeat it back to me every time even the hint of rain threatened, which was every day during the rainy season.

Anyway, the ones that I sometimes hear come out of Beau's (or his parents') mouths always make me laugh, because it's like they made them up on the spot. Here are some I've started to collect. Some are obvious, some not so much. Notice prevalent theme of "shit."

1. Bird dog it down.

2. Goofier than a pet coon.

3. Can't spell "cat" on three tries.
(I heard this one from a dean at the university)

4. Ornerier than cat shit
(A bizarre one, and a favorite of Beau's).

5. "Couple three" months ago
(translation: "2-3" months ago. I hear this one all the time in Missoula)

6. Went to shit and the hogs ate her.
(I still don't know what this means)

7. Don't that make you wanna shit in your hat 'til the band breaks?
(Ew).

8. As full of shit as a Christmas goose
(more shit)

9. Drier than a popcorn fart
(still with the shit!) "Nuh uh. That's a shitless fart! It's dry!" said Beau.

10. She was so drunk that she couldn't scratch her ass with a wildcat in each hand. A much more colorful take than the "couldn't find his ass with both hands" that I've heard.
("That also goes for anyone who is just mildly coordinated," said Beau).

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And one my beloved great grandmother used to say when waving goodbye to us:
"Come good home!"

Um, okay! *wave*